Gen 2:18–25 — A Helper for Adam

As we are making our way through the opening chapters of Genesis, we are observing and witnessing what God’s purpose for creation is. In fact, I sort of feel like as we are going through this whole section of Genesis, these opening chapters, that we are being told the entire purpose and meaning of life. This is the most important thing to know, is that this world was created by God that we are made in the image of God, that God has a purpose for this creation. That purpose, of course, is that this world would be populated with image bearers and become the theater of God’s glory.

We talked about how the cosmos itself, heaven and earth, is God’s cosmic temple, and that how within that, God also set aside the garden as this holy place where God would dwell with his people. The fact that the garden is a holy place, it is a sanctuary, is indicated by the fact that God commanded the man to work the garden and to keep it. Genesis 2, verse 15, the Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and to keep it. To keep it like a custodian, to keep it like a gardener. But also to keep it like a priest whose job is to maintain the sanctity and the holiness of that place. The word that is used there, to keep, is the same word that is used later on in reference to the priests and the Levites who have the job of upholding the holiness of the sanctuary, the tabernacle that God commanded the Israelites to make.

Remember, this whole section of Genesis, in fact, the entire book of Genesis, but especially this section, is being communicated to Israel at Mount Sinai, or perhaps in the wilderness, but it is being communicated to Israel in order to communicate to them God’s purposes for them as God’s holy people. And so surely they would have recognized that the Garden of Eden here is being presented like a holy dwelling place for God with his people. Surely they would have heard the overtones and the connections there with that command to guard the sanctuary just as the Levites were commanded to guard the tabernacle. And so we are seeing here the whole meaning of life, the whole purpose of life. What God was doing at creation was creating this holy cosmic sanctuary for God to dwell with his people who are made in his image.

And so it is such a delight to meditate upon all of the deep, profound truths that are found here in the opening chapters of the Bible. The entirety of the rest of the Bible is simply explaining how God is going to achieve this purpose in spite of man’s failure. Even though Adam and Eve sinned, and they seemingly violated the purpose and were expelled from the garden. It seemed like the whole plan was crumbling into ashes. No, the Bible says no, God is still going to accomplish this grand purpose that he has for creation. He is going to do so first in types and shadows through the nation of Israel, but that was only a picture. He is going to do it ultimately and climactically through Christ and his work of salvation and the formation of his bride.

And so here we are, at the very headwaters of the history of the Bible, of the history of creation itself, and we are brought to this wonderful text where we find something very significant, which is that Adam, although he was assigned this task, to make the world this holy sanctuary, to multiply and fill the earth with image bearers so that God could dwell with his people, that although Adam was commanded to do this, yet he was alone. The Lord God said, verse 18, it is not good that the man should be alone. How can he? How can he be fruitful and multiply unless he has a partner? And so the story of creation here turns to this beautiful parable of the relationship between Christ and his church as we see God creating a wonderful partner and helper for Adam in order to achieve this glorious cosmic mission that he has entrusted to him.

A Helper Fit for Adam

After saying it is not good that the man should be alone, it is not good because he cannot fulfill his mission unless he has this partner, God says, I will make a helper fit for him. And that phrase, a helper fit for him, is mentioned again in verse 20, that for Adam there was not found among the animals a helper who was fit for him.

This phrase, a helper fit for him, is very interesting. It is a little bit hard to translate, not the word helper, the word helper is easy, but it is the next word that is difficult to translate. The next word is sometimes translated fit, or if you guys remember the old King James, the word that was used there was meet, not M-E-A-T, but M-E-E-T. And the word meet, in old Elizabethan style of English, means something like suitable or appropriate or fit. That is where we get the word you sometimes hear people say today, my wife is my helpmeet. That is where that comes from. It comes from that old King James translation, the helper who is fit or meet for Adam.

Because it does not make sense in modern English to say helpmeet, people change it to helpmate. With an A, but that is not what it really meant originally. It meant help meet, that is a helper who is fit or suitable to the man. This word suitable, can be translated as suitable or fit. Or in the Elizabethan English, meet, M-E-E-T, this word symbolizes two things at the same time. It connects two things together that are hard to grasp. On the one hand, it indicates the similarity of the woman to the man, that she is like him. She is made in the image of God. She is not from the animals. The animals are not made in the image of God.

When God brought all the animals to man and he said, go ahead and name them and search for a suitable partner for you, Adam could not find one. He gave names to all the creatures, but for Adam, there was not found a helper that was suitable for him, that was appropriate to him, that was made in the image of God like him and therefore able to be on par with him and to connect with him in a complimentary way.

But there is a second aspect to this word. The word not only indicates this idea of being on the same level and having a certain degree of appropriate complementarity to the man, there is also this idea of difference. In fact, it could be translated, this is a Hebrew phrase, it is a prepositional phrase that has two parts to it. It could be even translated as like opposite. That God said, I am going to find a helper who is like opposite to the man. Like the man, but yet clearly different.

How often we experience that in our own lives, when we see the differences between males and females. We are so similar, we are both human, and yet male and females are very different. Different physically, different biologically, different mentally, different psychologically, different in so many ways, and yet in a beautiful way, complementary to The male. And so this phrase is hard to fully encompass all of the meanings that are implied here, but it has this idea of similarity, but also difference. A difference that is complementary to the man.

Woman Built from Man

God built a woman from man’s side. So after it was determined that among the animals there was no helper that was suitable for the man, the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man. And while he slept, took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man He made into a woman and brought her to the man.

God literally built a woman from his rib. That is the Hebrew word there. It is translated as made, but it literally is the word built. He built a woman out of man’s side, out of his rib, and brought her to the man. This is very important. The fact that the woman derives from the man is highly significant.

There is a passage in 1 Corinthians where the Apostle Paul is talking about this passage. He actually comments upon this whole passage that we just read and this whole narrative of how man’s alone, he needs a helper, cannot find the helper from the animal realm. But then God makes, builds a woman out of his side and brings her to the man.

The Apostle Paul in 1 Corinthians 11 talks about this. Now, the whole context of 1 Corinthians 11 is another topic for another day, but that is the topic of head coverings. And in worship, whether women who are prophesying and publicly praying in the worship service should do so with their heads uncovered or covered. And I am not going to get into all the nuts and bolts of that, that is a longer discussion. But just very interestingly, just to note, what does Paul argue for in that context? Just looking at, taking a step back, and looking at the main point that he is trying to make. He says, we need to recognize the proper order of headship that God has established in creation. Which is, that the woman is in subordination to the man, and the man is the head of the woman. And Christ is the head of the man. And so that is why he is getting into this whole issue of head coverings because he is trying to say that in worship we need to make sure that we honor this creation ordinance that the man has the headship over the woman, that the husband has headship over the wife.

And to support that, to make his argument for that, that is why he wants the women to wear head coverings, to support that, he appeals to this passage. He appeals to Genesis chapter two, this whole narrative that we just read. And he says, the reason why we need to do this, to honor this proper order and hierarchy in creation, is because man was not made from woman, but woman from man. God did not make the woman first and then take something from her and form that into a man. The other way around, God made the man first, put him into a sleep, took the rib out, formed the rib into a woman, and then brought the woman to the man to be his helper.

The origin of woman from man shows us that the woman is subordinate to the authority of the man. And Paul makes that argument. He is saying this is the proof, this is the evidence of this headship authority that the man has headship over the woman and that the woman is subordinate to the man. It is derived from this passage here and from the order in which these things took place. Not only the order that man was made first, then the woman, but also the fact that the woman originates from the man. She comes from him. And her origin from him is then what shows that she is subordinate to the authority of the man.

I know in our egalitarian age all of this sounds very foreign and maybe a little bit uncomfortable for us. But this is clearly what the text is teaching us. And we have Paul’s own authoritative exegesis of it in 1st Corinthians 11. To show us that we are interpreting this passage correctly. This is what the Bible teaches.

The Apostle Paul then concludes, I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. And he derives this from Genesis 2.

Now what happens when God forms the woman and brings him to the man? The man is delighted with this wonderful gift that God has given to him. This is almost like a wedding ceremony. Like the bride coming down the aisle and being presented to her husband. And the man is rejoicing at this wonderful blessing that God has given him. And he says in verse 23, this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh, not like the animals. I did not have that sense of connection with them. But here is someone that is finally perfect for me. Here is someone who is exactly what I am looking for. This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.”

And then, what does the man do? The man names her. He gives her a name, just like he had done with the animals. Exercising his dominion and authority over the lower order of creation by giving them names. He also does the same with this wonderful woman that he has been given by God. She shall be called Woman. And in my English translation, the word Woman is capitalized. This is her name. She shall be called Woman with a capital W. Why? Because she was taken out of man with a capital M. In Hebrew, it is even clearer. Even in English, you can hear the connection. Wuh, man. Sounds like man. Well, in Hebrew, it is even stronger. In Hebrew, it says, she shall be called Eshah, because she was taken out of Esh. Esh, Eshah. You see the clear connection there.

You see, again, the same idea that is implied in that word suitable. It is like opposite. There is definite complementarity, but also difference. There is likeness. They both share the image of God, and yet there is also subordination. And this is derived from the fact that the woman has her origin from the man. She will be called Isha because she was taken out of Ish. She will be called woman because of her origin from the man.

Again, indicating likeness and equal share in the divine image of God, but also subordination. Because she is given to the man in order for the man to be able to fulfill his mandate. God created man with this goal to be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth with the glory of God. To bring about the consummation of this cosmic glorious sanctuary where God dwells with his people. Where the entire creation with all the human race reflecting the image of God is now bringing glory and honor to God. So that the whole universe is the theater of God’s glory and the place for God to have union and communion with his people forever.

That is the purpose that man was given. And he has to do this task. He has to fulfill this task. He has to populate the earth. How can he do this on his own? How can he do this if he is alone? He needed a woman to be his helper. He cannot fulfill his mandate to be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and accomplish this glorious purpose that God has for creation without her. Only a woman who is sexually different from the man, but also like the man, in the fact that she too is made in the image of God, can fulfill that role.

And we should also tie this whole passage in back to chapter one, verse 27. Because in chapter one, verse 27, it is very clear that when God created man in his own image, he included the female to be a part of that. God created man in his own image. In the image of God, he created him, male and female, he created them. The woman is equally made in the image of God, but she is not a man. She is different from the man and she is there to be his suitable helper, this perfect complementary helper who is there to be by his side to help him accomplish this glorious task.

What a wonderful calling this is for the woman. The woman is given to help the man in his kingly and priestly tasks. God brought her to the man, presented her to the man in order that she might help him. She herself is not a king. She herself is not a priest who has this job of engaging in holy war and protecting the sanctuary from that which does not belong. And of course, that reminds us of just how bad it was that when you turn the page over to chapter three, that she was the one that first entered into a conversation and dialogue with the serpent. That was not the order in which it was supposed to take place. Adam was supposed to do that. Adam was supposed to step forward and say, be gone, Satan. And he was supposed to execute God’s judgment against the serpent as that kingly and priestly guardian of the sanctuary.

But the point is that she herself, the woman, is not the king, she is not the priest, but she is a helper fit for a king. In fact, this word helper that is used twice in our text, a helper suitable for him, the word helper is used many times in the scriptures, but one place where it does occur that is very relevant to this passage is in 1 Chronicles 12. 1 Chronicles 12 is the story of David’s mighty men. Remember, David had these mighty men who were, he was the king, but he had these mighty men who served under him, and they were his helpers. They helped David in war. David was in charge. He was the one saying, okay, here is what our agenda is for today. We are going to go after the Philistines on that hill, and his mighty men would follow. But they were there to help him, to help him in the war, to accomplish God’s purposes through the king.

And so though the woman herself is not the king, she is a helper fit for a king. And in this way, through her proper role, though subordinate to that of the man, through her proper role, she too is participating in this glorious cosmic project that God has in store for humanity. There is a royal dignity then to that wifely role of submission and being the helper fit for a king. Working together on this glorious temple building project as man’s helper. What an amazing and glorious call that is.

The First Marriage

Notice then in verse 24 that Moses, as the narrator of this whole, passage about the first wedding Moses himself in verse 24 comments on it and says that this is paradigmatic for all time. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and they shall become one flesh. That is an astonishing moment where you hear the voice of Moses himself interjected into the text. He is not just simply the distant narrator telling you this is what happened, this is what happened. Here for one verse, Moses himself speaks up and makes a profound theological point.

And he says, if you have been following the story, I want you to understand this is really important because this is why it is that a man must leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife. And they must be in a one flesh union together. It has paradigmatic significance for all marriages to come. And Jesus himself, in Matthew chapter 19 and Mark 10, he appeals to this very verse and reinforces this as the key to his argument against easy divorce. Many of the Jews in the time of Jesus were arguing for easy divorce, that a man could divorce his wife for any reason whatsoever, if she just burned the toast. If you do not like her for some reason, you can get rid of her at the snap of a finger. And all you have to do is just write a certificate and get rid of her. And Jesus is saying, how can you view marriage that way? When the Bible itself tells us, when Moses himself told us, that this is a holy, one flesh union. This is a sacred bond. And what God has joined together, Jesus says, let not man easily turn asunder and turn into something that can be broken at the snap of a finger.

And so just as Moses here is making his paradigmatic theological comment upon the narrative to say this is significant and all the marriages to come are to be based upon this model and this archetype, so also Jesus himself does the same and says it is significant. That is why the word is in the imperative, well, technically it is the future tense, but it has an imperatival meaning. It says, therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and shall hold fast to his wife. Just like we, in the Ten Commandments, we will say you shall not commit adultery. It is technically a future tense verb, but it has imperatival meaning to it. You have to do this. This is imperative because this is God’s ideal. This is God’s pattern for marriage. What can we derive from this text? What are some helpful things we can learn from this text? Three things. The essence of marriage, the purpose of marriage, and the roles of marriage.

The Essence of Marriage

The essence of marriage, according to our text, is that it is a one flesh union. The intimacy that takes place within marriage, both at the physical level, in terms of physical intimacy, but also at the emotional, psychological, and spiritual level. This union, this intimacy, this one flesh union that is described here in our text is not an optional thing. It is not as though marriage is just simply a contract where two people are going to work together to have a family or, have an economic arrangement where they can do something together. No, it is this one flesh union. It is this intimacy that is not optional, but lies at the heart of what marriage is. And that is why we must cling and hold fast to each other.

Interesting that phrase, or that verb, to hold fast, where Moses says, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, that verb that is used there is the same verb that is used later on in the Mosaic law when God is calling Israel to hold fast to the covenant. Israel is called to hold fast to God’s law, to hold fast to God’s covenant, to hold fast in the same degree of mutual exclusivity. Israel is not supposed to go out and worship other gods. That would be like committing adultery with God. No, Israel is bound to God, to Yahweh alone. And therefore, Israel must hold fast to the Lord in covenant faithfulness and exclusivity. And by implication as well, Yahweh is also promising the same to Israel, that He is going to hold fast to her. He is going to be faithful to His covenant promises to His people.

Of course, later on in the Bible, the prophets will use this very point to say that as they are coming to Israel with this covenant lawsuit, what are they saying to Israel? They are saying, you have been unfaithful to the Lord. You have transgressed the covenant by worshiping other gods. And so God is now going to divorce you because He is going to send you into exile because of your unfaithfulness. And yet, in the very midst of this warning and this judgment that the prophets brought, they also spoke of a what? They spoke of a reconciliation that would happen. And that is why you have the whole book of Hosea where Hosea is told to marry an unfaithful woman to show God’s faithfulness to his people.

This whole text here then is super important for the whole unfolding of biblical theology, not only with Israel and Yahweh, but then moving forward to Christ and the Church. The entire Bible, in effect, is just expounding this very verb here, to hold fast, in Genesis 2:24. And it is saying that God is holding fast to us because of His covenant love, in spite of our unfaithfulness. And he is going to win us back to himself, he is going to pursue the wayward wife, he is going to bring us back into covenant with himself, but he also calls us then to hold fast to him in gratitude and love.

So what is the essence of marriage then? It is a one flesh union. Both must cling to and hold fast to each other in covenant faithfulness and exclusive love. Marriage is a sacred covenant. Marriage is sacred, it is holy. It is not just simply a contract. It is not just simply two friends who are cooperating together to do something, to accomplish something in this world. No, marriage is the sacred holy covenant that ultimately reflects the sacred covenant between God and his people. And therefore, because marriage is a one flesh union, it is not to be broken. Easily or lightly. Tragically, sometimes it does break because of unfaithfulness, but it cannot be broken lightly or easily, and we must always hold this ideal. That is what Jesus was saying to the Pharisees. He was not saying that divorce could never happen. He does recognize that adultery sometimes happens, such impenitent and persistent adultery that the marriage covenant is utterly broken, but he is saying, do not just treat it like it is this discardable thing. It is this holy, sacred, one-flesh union. Take it seriously. Honor the sacredness of it.

The Purpose of Marriage

The second point we learn is not only is the essence of marriage a one-flesh union, but we also learn the purpose. The entire purpose for which God is bringing this woman to the man is to help him in order to fulfill his dominion mandate of being fruitful and multiplying. And that shows us then that the purpose of marriage is to have children and to raise children. Children, of course, are the normal result of this one flesh union. Now, of course, there are exceptions after the fall, and some people are not able to have children, and there can be all kinds of difficulties after the fall, but this is still the purpose, this is still the ideal.

And even now, God is using Christian families, and he is using that bond of union between a Christian man and a Christian woman to build Christian families, to advance the kingdom, to populate heaven. We often think of the Great Commission as being focused on going out into the world and preaching the gospel out there to unbelievers and to the nations and to the unreached. But there is also the Great Commission within the home. That is why we practice infant baptism and covenant nurture because God is using covenant nurture and the development of Christian families and the raising of Christian children within the church just as much as he is using the outward sending out of missionaries and evangelists into the world. He is using that too in order to populate heaven.

I was almost going to say, this is a little bit pushing it maybe, a little bit too far, but I was almost going to say that maybe this passage is the ultimate proof for infant baptism. At first you might think it does not really, it does not really talk about infant baptism here, but if you think about it, is this not text telling us that the entire purpose of marriage is to populate heaven. That is the purpose of it. And so if that is the case, then how can we not baptize our children and bring them into the church and raise them as Christians within the church? Because it is woven into the very fabric of creation. The very way that God made the universe at the very beginning. At the alpha point of the whole story is this fundamental reality of the one flesh union of a man and a woman that produces children. And the purpose of that is to multiply and fill the earth and to bring about the cosmic fulfillment of God’s glorious eternal eschatological temple. So how can we not believe in incorporating our children within the body of Christ and the Church? It is woven into the very fabric of creation itself. Grace does not abolish nature, but sanctifies it. And the third thing we learn from this passage is not only the essence of marriage being a one flesh union, not only the purpose of marriage to be fruitful and multiply, but we also learn the roles of marriage.

Roles in Marriage

The text makes it very clear that the roles are that Adam was created first and then the woman, and that the man is the one who has this leadership role as God’s anointed king and priest, and the woman is the one who is there to be the helper. To the man. And so the proper roles within marriage are, just as Paul explains in Ephesians chapter five, that husbands are to lead their wives, and to lead them spiritually, and to take care of them, and to pursue their mission as God’s head and leaders, and then to use their wives as their helpers.

And the wife also is to embrace her God-ordained role as a helper, to respect her husband, to follow his lead, and to be there to help him. And the main way that a woman does that is through having children and taking care of children. The Bible teaches that this is what makes a happy marriage. A happy marriage is when we are properly following the order as it was established at creation.

Later on, we are going to read in Genesis 3 that because of the fall, things begin to change. In Genesis 3, we will talk about this when we get to it in a few weeks, but in Genesis 3:16, because of sin coming into the world, these relationships begin to be distorted. And he says, God says to the woman that her desire will be contrary to the husband and he in turn is going to rule harshly over you, over the woman. And so this proper benevolent leadership role of the husband is going to be perverted into something sinful and harmful and an oppressive rulership. But that is because of sin.

And vice versa for the woman, she is going to be tempted to have her desires to be contrary to the husband and to want to usurp his authority. But again, that is because of sin. And the wonderful news of the gospel is that in Christ and by the Spirit, those sinful distortions of the proper role between men and women are being healed. And the Lord is helping us in Christ and by the Spirit He is helping us as husbands to properly lead and love our wives. He is helping us as wives to properly submit to, to voluntarily, joyfully submit to our husbands in order to be their happy helpers. That is the whole point.

According to our text, marriage flourishes when the husband leads and the wife joyfully helps. That is the proper order of creation and that is what a happy marriage looks like. Things just work out better when we follow God’s creation design for marriage.

Perhaps you have heard the phrase, happy wife, happy life. Have you heard that phrase before? I believe that is not true. That is not what the Bible teaches. The Bible does not teach that a woman is only happy when her husband is serving her needs. Happy wife, happy life is not true. A man should not and cannot make his wife’s happiness the aim of his life.

According to our text, Adam had his purpose and his goal, which is what? To fulfill this glorious cosmic mission that God had entrusted to him. And his wife was given to him to be the helper towards that goal. I would prefer another phrase instead of that one. I would say, loving leader, happy helper. Is that not the right way to think about it? Loving leader, happy helper. The husband’s responsibility is to be the head, to lead in love. Patterned after Christ, sacrificial care for the church. And the wife’s role is to be a suitable helper, to find contentment, to find her purpose and meaning in life in supporting her husband’s God-given mission. That is what our text is calling us to.

Marriage flourishes. Again, I will just repeat that. Marriage flourishes when the husband leads and the wife joyfully helps. Loving leader, happy helper.

We fall short of this ideal in so many ways. Men have their own temptations to misuse their authority and to mistreat their wives. Wives have their temptations to try to usurp their husband’s authority and to get what they want, rather than being a happy helper to their husband.

We all have our temptations, but the Lord in his grace, by the power of the Spirit, is helping us to look beyond our own personal happiness that we are trying to achieve in this life, and to see that we are part of something bigger. A part of something much more glorious and grand that God is accomplishing.

It is amazing, is it not, that the Bible begins and ends with a wedding. It begins with this first wedding when Eve is brought to Adam as the helper suitable for him, but it ends in Revelation 21 with the bride coming down out of heaven prepared for her husband, the Lord Jesus Christ.

Marriage and the Gospel

The Bible begins and ends with a wedding, showing us that God’s purpose of covenant union between God and his people is what it is all about. That is the whole purpose of everything. That is why Christ became man. He became a man so that we might have that one flesh union with God through the incarnate Christ.

And he is even using our flawed and imperfect marriages to contribute to that glorious goal. What a wonderful and encouraging thing that is for us.